Marit


Friend of Inge

Marit (33) misses her friend Inge every day.


‘When Inge was in Bali, two years before her death, she sent me a picture of a flower she really liked: frangipani. The focus in the picture was unclear, taken quickly, very much the way Inge was. Disorganized, funny, things didn’t have to be perfect.

Inge was a livewire. She was so lively she brought excitement to every party. I was home when my boyfriend and I heard on the news that a plane headed to Kuala Lumpur had crashed. I ran outside and screamed like a madwoman. The next day we went to visit her family. Ordinarily you say ‘Sorry for your loss,’ but not this time. What can you say, when you haven’t seen any bodies yet? When there is no official confirmation at all? Sure, you know within you: Gijs and Inge are dead. Otherwise they would have called or would have sent holiday pictures. But you also keep hoping. Maybe they were on a different flight and don’t have Wi-Fi…

‘When I saw that flower, I knew right away’

Before the memorial service, in the week after the crash, I wanted to put frangipani flowers everywhere. Apparently, frangipani flowers grow only on Bali and are cultivated in a few nurseries in the Netherlands. So together with some friends and acquaintances of Gijs and Inge’s, we called them all. We managed to gather twelve of those plants, from all corners of the country. When I saw them there, I told my boyfriend: ‘Wow. I want a tattoo of that one on my foot. To remember Inge.’

I always wanted a tattoo, but I had no idea of what. It feels so wonderful to look down and see her flower there. So a friend and I went to a tattoo shop with that blurred, fuzzy picture that Inge had taken so quickly. We didn't have any other pictures, hadn’t done any research, it was our very first tattoo. We arrived unprepared. That made it special too. Not only did we have Inge’s favorite flower immortalized on our bodies, we went about it just as she would have.’



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